There’s a lot to be said for the humble quick¡e. The spontaneity. The excitement. The fact that when it’s over very quickly you have a legitimate excuse – it was meant to be! And women love them too. Believe it or not, we aren’t always in the mood for staring into your eyes or ticking off a procession of positions like it’s some kind of naked declathlοn.
We get lazy, too. But there’s a way to do quickιes right so you’re not the only one that’s gotten off. Here are eight things that will help make sure she enjoys it just as much as you (you know, so you can have more of them…)
1. Give her a head start
Sure, sometimes a quickie is a spontaneous sort of affair. But why not plan for one? Before your partner heads off to work in the morning, let her in on your plans for the evening before you head out for that dinner or work event you already have on the calendar.
She’ll be thinking about you all day and when the time comes, she’ll already have you – and ideally an οrgasm – on her mind. Remember, οrgasms are mostly mental – especially for women.
So get her head in the game early and you’ll have less work to do on the spot.
2. Danger. OK, we’re not talking risking life and limb here. But wondering if you might get caught any second can really up the excitement ante.
Think about it: You generally want to secure the perimeter when you are settling in for a long session. When it’s a quickie you have in mind, making things a little more daring can up the excitement drastically.
So leave that door or window cracked or time things just a little too close and let the threat of being caught get her to the finish line sooner.
Even quick¡es deserve a good setting. Most women relish a safe, comfortable, clean environment when it comes to sεx.
So forget that filthy bar bathroom or that cheap hotel. Nothing is less sεxy then worrying about dirty sheets – or worse.
If you want your partner to get off in good time, make sure the setting is appealing and she’s feeling comfortable (as in, she’s thinking about getting “dirty” and not on the toilet paper stuck to her shoe…)
4. Oral first
The tongue is an ideal tool for getting a woman ready for a quickie. A study published in the Journal of Sεxual Medicine found that 70% of women require direct clitoral stimulation to οrgasm – so when time is of the essence, forget penetration till the very end.
The clitoris is where you ultimately want to focus your energy. Spend time on her outer lips first and then and let your tongue find her clitoris and refuse to stray. It’ll be your turn next.
5. Assume the position
As discussed, the centre of women’s pleasure is the clitoris, not the vagina. So while penetration is the key sεx act for most men, it’s not at all the main attraction when it comes to female οrgasm.
So, during a quickie it’s imperative that the position you choose allows for her clitoral stimulation. Her on top is a great one so she can rub against you as you thrust.
If she prefers deeper penetration and wants to be taken from behind, be sure to reach around and tend to her clitoris as well.
6. Dirty talk
Never underestimate the power of talking dirty. This can bring you both from 1 to 100 faster than anything else on this list.
Research has shown that individuals competent in sεxual communication tend to experience increased sεxual pleasure. And while it may sound intimidating, it doesn’t have to be – you don’t have to sound like a pοrn star.
All you really need to be able to do is tell her what you’re thinking about and you’ll be well on your way. Words with lots of consonant energy to them (ie: f*ck or sh*t) are good bets as is a simple “I love feeling you”, etc. We’ll let you take it from there.
7. You can leave your hat on
And whatever else you like for that matter. Getting naked is generally on the menu when it comes to sεx. But when you’re talking quickie, the less you take off the better.
There’s something very sεxy about having your partner slide your skirt up or your jeans down and not bother with stripping you naked. So expose the bits that you plan to bring into play and leave the rest to the imagination.
7. Bring on the props. Just because it’s a quickie doesn’t mean you can’t bring some props into the equation. It doesn’t have to be anything over the top.
So think about things you may already have on hand – a tie or scarf can easily double as restraints. Feathers or ice cubes can make for fun sensory play. And an eye mask or blindfold can amp up the anticipation.
8. Focus on her. If this hasn’t been clear enough, quick¡es can be much easier for men than for women when it comes to reaching οrgasm.
So, wait to penetrate her and focus on her excitement to know when she is ready for you to enter her. Do it too soon and there’s no way the quickie will get her there.
But wait until she’s ready, focusing on her breathing and how she moves, and she will be chomping at the bit for you get her to finish line.
Try these tips to make any quickie work for her as much as it works for you. There’s nothing a woman appreciates more in bed than a man who is as hungry for her pleasure as he is for his own.
Jenny Block is a freelance sεx and lifestyle writer and the author of O Wow: Discovering Your Ultimate οrgasm (Cleis, August 2015). You can find her at www.jennyonthepage.com.